Ever since I can remeber I've had a dream, a deep desire to do 1 thing with my life. I gave up on that dream years ago, and threw it aside as a childish whim. But it won't leave. Deep down inside under everything I've buried it under, it's still there calling out to me. People ask me what My dreams are and I usually answer with "I don't even know" but thats a lie. I have a dream, its huge, and it's unattainable in my own efforts, it could even be labelled impossible. But i'm to scared to tell anyone. I can count the number of people on my hands that actually know what it is. It's not that someone told me I can't do it, or that I dont have what it takes. It's me, I've told myself that it will never happen, or more likely I've believed a lie that satan has planted in my mind.
I've come to realize lately that everyone believes in me, everyone except me.
I ask myself why I don't belive myself, and I am at a loss for words. What is it that holds me back from pursuing what I truly believe God has placed on my heart? What is it that keeps me from sharing my dreams? The only reason I have is fear. Fear of man, fear of failing, fear of it being a childish whim, fear of it not coming to pass, it all boils down to fear.
I can't live by fear any longer.
Satan I rebuke and cut off the lies that you have spoken to me regarding my future and what I am capable or incapable of. For God has placed a calling on my life and there is nothing that is going to stop me from going after it, especially not you.
Lord prepare my heart, take this dream, and teach me to believe in myself.
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