Identity & Worship

"I'll give you all the kingdoms of the world if you give to me a moment of worship." This question was Satan’s attempt to swindle Jesus’ authority from Him. This is a revealing glimpse into the power and value in the action of worship.

The Devil knows that if your identity is misplaced (driven by insecurity - which is misplaced identity) your worship will be up for grabs.

Sam Brassfeild says this, "If it's not all about worship why was Satan willing to (seemingly) forfeit EVERYTHING to receive worship?"

The Devil fights so hard for your attention. Because he knows if he can have your attention he'll soon have your affection.

Because whatever you give your thoughts to, you will ultimately ascribe value to.

And what you ascribe value to you will worship.

Resting your identity in Him guards your worship for Him.

-Gabriel Allred.

People are hungry for God not a perfectly executed guitar solo.

I never want to lead worship just because I can.

I never want to preach just because I can.

I never want to encourage someone just because I can.

I never want to sing just because I can.

I never want to be in a leadership role just because I can.

I want everything I do to be based solely on Christ and come out of an overflow of my growing intimacy with Him.

I see too many in ministry who are leading people simply because they are talented, and because they can do it. This is sad.  Don’t get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with being talented, but apart from Christ our talent will only get us so far. It will only take those we are leading so far.

We live in a world where we are bombarded with images, songs and movies all clearly displaying people’s talent, and yet we live in a society that is dying to hear of the living Jesus.  They are hungry for unconditional & unfailing love and an intimate relationship that brings wholeness, joy, peace, hope and true satisfaction.  Something that is real.

“Excellence has become our god, and God our motivation behind it”.  I firmly believe that God deserves the best of the best, but when that is raised as more important than having an growing relationship with God, I don’t think that God is honoured to the fullest.  It’s easy to tell the difference between a worship leader, or pastor who has spent time growing intimate with God and one who hasn’t, even if they are incredibly talented.

I don’t claim to have this all figured out. I don’t claim to be even close to knowing what it means to be intimate with God and function out of that, and I definitely don’t have a problem with guitar solos. I just think its easy in our society today to miss out on what’s truly important in our lives.

God teach us the ways of Your heart.

you smile, I smile.

Ever have one of those days when you say “yeah, this is me” and everything about it makes you smile from the depths of your soul?

Today was one of those days for me.

I run to You

I’ve never felt more faithless in my entire life as I have in the past few days. Not faithless in the sense of doubting the foundations of what I believe, but faithless in the sense of standing in front of a seemingly huge mountain of impossibility and there is no way around- only over.

Being in a place of having to say over and over “God, I can’t go one more step without your strength” is hard & humbling. I’m looking at a line of closed doors and as time passes they seem to be coming closer and closer. If a window opens every time a door closes….where is my window? Am I doing something wrong? Where should I be looking? Am I missing something? The questions that flow through my mind are suffocating me and creating unneeded anxiety.

Last night, with tears streaming down my face, I thanked God for stretching my faith. I hate everything about the process, but I know that breakthrough will come and I’ll realize that this season wasn’t as hard as I thought. 

But for now, I’m weaker than I’ve ever been and I’ve realized the hard way that I can’t do life in my own strength.

God has begun the trek up my “seemingly impossible mountain”.  If I stand here any longer I’ll die.  I hear my Father say: “This is the way, walk in it..” (Isaiah 30:21) My heart is racing and my legs feel like they are made of lead. I can’t do this, I can’t do this….

STEP.

walk, walk walk.

RRRRUUUNNNNNN.

…faith as small as a mustard seed is all it takes.

Who are we fooling?

Recently I’ve been feeling extremely overwhelmed by homework, missing my family, and most recently the unknowns of this summer. I’ve also felt this pressure upon me to do more, be more, speak more, etc, and its wearing me out because I’m not meeting  those expectations. As I sat in my room last night and questioned why I was feeling this way, I was reminded of something I heard at lifegroup on Thursday. We talked about false assumptions about our life’s purpose and this one hit me hard.

“False: Your life’s mission is similar to that of your peers”

Now I realize that everyone has their own mission, calling, niche and that It’s unfair to compare one another because we are all different. But it’s easy to compare “works”, “accomplishments” and “plans”, to the point of forgetting what God has laid in front of you.

One of my main resolutions for 2011 is to be myself, and  I’ve overcome the “physical” side of this, where I no longer do things out of the need to people please, but there is still the mental side of this.

When you feel the  need to become more involved in ministry simply because the people around you are: STOP.

When you feel like you’re useless because your waiting to hear where God is wanting to take you, and the people around you already know: STOP.

When you feel like you are going no where in life because the people around you all have life plans and you don’t:STOP.

Breathe. and then breathe again, because although we are all on the same mission, we are on different roads, mean’t to accomplish different goals. No one is better than another, we are a team.

God has laid out a specific plan for each of his children, none of them are comparable, none of them are more or less important than another. We are all equal.

Having said that…that doesn’t leave room for excuses to sit on your butt and do nothing.

Seek God out for his priorities for your life. Ask for vision, and then strength to work towards and accomplish the goals He has set before you.  Ask for discernment to know which expectations are Gods and which ones are man imposed.

Ask. Seek. Knock…..hard & relentlessly.

He will answer- I believe that with all my heart.

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I’m not moving until You say Go.

You’ll be there the moment I come out in white.

“Every February I think of you and practice writing valentines”

:)

..I’ll stop praying for an escape

A faith-stretching journey pretty much sums up my life thus far.  Every big decisions that comes my way, stands in front of me and yells “How much do you really trust Jesus?”. It always requires a risk, a step of faith, serious seeking -in order to see the plans unfold. Recently, a plan that I had been basing other plans around fell through. I have no clue where to go, where to start looking, what direction I should take. shouldn’t I be used to this? shouldn’t I have no problem having peace? yeah right. 

When I first found out I was like “seriously God, can’t I just get a break, just this once can’t you just give me a clear solid plan?”  I see so many people around me whose plans fall almost effortlessly into their laps, and it would seem as though no faith was even required on their part. WHY CAN’T I HAVE THAT JUST ONCE?

I’m pretty sure God laughs at my petty complaints. He doesn’t care that my plan didn’t work out, It doesn’t matter to him where I go this summer, whether I intern or work retail. He cares about my heart, my character, and most importantly that I am prepared for my destiny.

I’m not called to an “easy” life. Everything I do has become a faith test, and as much as it frustrates me some days, I wouldn’t trade it  for anything because I’ve learnt how to move without having all the steps figured out. I’ve learnt how to jump when I can’t see what’s at the bottom. You don’t learn those things by having every step planned out in advance.

My life is not my own, and it’s more than ok that I don’t have a plan for this summer, for after grad, or for my entire life. God created my life and I know that He can handle planning it. I trust Him.

“Speak, for your servant is listening” – 1 Sam 3:10

A raging fire that can’t be fathomed

I don’t understand…

Jess, I never promised you understanding, I promised I’d never leave you or forsake you and that I am trustworthy and just. I promised that my ways are higher that your own, and that I am in control no matter how out of control life seems.

TRUST ME. Throw your life upon me and dare to believe that I am good beyond measure. TRUST ME for I will never fail you.

…..Your heavenly Father.

..certain of what I do not see.

“Faith is the abandonment of all reliance on self, all attempts to achieve salvation by our own endeavours. Faith is the hand stretched out to receive God’s good gift, stretched out in the assurance that God will not fail to keep his promises”

-Morris

Spirit come…

Spirit come you're a mighty rain storm
a raging fire that cannot be fathomed

Spirit come you're a rolling flood over
these deserts dry and our hearts inhabit

Spirit come you're a gentle kiss that
breaks my defenses and steals my affections

God come, break these walls wide open
Love come, break our hearts wide open
Spirit come, our lives laid in the open
Your love, we’re drowning in this ocean