We only know when it’s gone.

This is the last blog I will ever post in November 2010 because tomorrow is December. Why does that matter? It matters because another month has passed and lately I've been thinking A LOT about time.

Time is important because it runs out.

My time as a child has run out…

My time at high school has run out…

My time at PLBC will run out…

My time with certain people will run out…

The last one is the one that scares me the most, not as in I’m afraid they will die, but that they wont be actively involved in my life like they are now.

I feel like humans live their lives as if they have all the time in the world, and I feel like that’s one of the reasons we justify apathy, procrastination and down right laziness.

I think it’s important to consider the amount of time that God has given us in certain areas, obviously we never know fully what His will is and where we will be going. But I do know that I've been given 4 years at bible school, and I am down to 1.5 left.  How does that realization change my priorities and what I spend my time on?

I’ve also been thinking a lot about God’s timing.

Timing is important because it sets the pace of our lives.

Many times I want to jump ahead of God and bring certain desires to fruition. But that never works, because God’s timing is best, and it’s always perfect.

So how do you live in God’s perfect timing, while keeping in mind that time eventually runs out?

The only answer that I’ve come up with is that I need to make the most of everything, and use a serious amount of my  time seeking God’s face, and listening to His heartbeat.

God’s heartbeat is like a metronome,  setting the perfect timing of our lives. Listen to it.

These are some of the things that I have been thinking about, I don’t write them to scare you into doing something with your life or make you worry about whether you’ll wake up tomorrow. I simply want to  challenge you to look at your life and allow God to show you the places where you need to use your time more wisely or invest it more deeply.  It’s different for all of us.

We’ve been given the gift of time so that we can bring God glory through following the dreams & desires He’s placed within us, and living out our God given potential. Anything less isn’t worth spending our time on!

Your love never runs out on me.

I want you to think about the people in your life that annoy you. The ones you can’t stand to be around, the ones who know exactly how to agitate you. The ones you avoid or ignore. The ones who you aren’t really friends with, but they seem to think you are best buds, but you’d rather they just leave you alone.

What if today you received news that they were killed in a car accident? Or they were so severely injured that it’s a miracle their heart is still pumping?

How does that change your perspective of them? The next time you saw them would you start a conversation instead of turning around to avoid them?

If no one is beyond the love of Christ, why do we treat them as if they are? Why does it take a tragedy to really make us reconsider what is important in life and who is important?  Life isn’t guaranteed. The people you rub shoulders with daily or talk to weekly-today could be the last time.

These kinds of questions have been running through my mind non-stop the past 12 hours. How would I treat people differently If I knew that today was the last time I’d see them? I’ve come to realize that I take life for granted. For some reason I think that I have all the time in the world to impact peoples lives, to say hi to them, to show them the love of Christ. But that's not always the case.

Today and everyday I want to make the most of every conversation, especially with those who I’ve avoided in the past. I’m not going to run myself ragged trying to talk to every single person I see, but if God opens a door of opportunity I’m going to take it, and make the most of it, because tomorrow isn’t guaranteed.

Be Thou my Vision

This morning as I read through a few chapters of Matthew, I was once again inspired by Jesus promises.  Here are a few that God challenged me to believe  with all my heart, and know without a shadow of a doubt that they will be fulfilled in my life.

“But seek first His kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well” – Matt 6:33

“Ask, and it will be given to you, seek and you will find, knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives and, he who seeks finds; and to him who knocks, the door will be opened.” –Matt 7:7,8

What or who am I seeking? What kinds of things am I asking for? What doors am I knocking at? 

1.Seek God, not for what He can do for you, but for who He is.

2.Ask for the impossible.

and

3.Knock without ceasing. Don’t stop until you have received what God has promised you.

1.Seek God.

Every decision we make, every motive, and every word we say should be wrapped in God.  Everything we do, should flow out of a heart that is continually seeking Him.

Lord, remind us of this daily.

Walking on Water.

This past week has been one of being incredibly challenged. God’s been revealing myself to me. Certain thought patterns that I have put myself through and continue to, somehow hoping to get a different outcome, but of course it never happens. God began talking to me about this as I walked to church on Sunday and It hit me like a ton of bricks.

The cycle needs to be broken.

The cycle of needing to be in control, of thinking that God needs my help to figure certain things out. A pattern of impatience that gives up hope before hopes been given a chance. A struggle of frustration, because what I wanted to happen isn’t happening in the way I want it to. Essentially I needed me broken, my own will. If I don’t break out of the cycle I’ll stay in the same spot forever.

But this time it has to be different, because God is doing a new thing, and the patterns of the past no longer cut it, not that they ever did anyways.

This semester I am in Freedom Session and I have been made aware of how I deal with pain, and how I have trained myself to be guarded and to protect myself, even in areas and at times where its not needed. This is what the cycles in my life are. They have been created out of my past hurts, and situations where I believed that I didn’t measure up and therefore I had to change or become better.

But God is for me, and He calls me his beloved daughter, therefore I don’t have to change for anyone but Him, I don’t have to please anyone but Him. I don’t have to live for anyone but Him. I can be whole, and complete in Him, because when that happens then everything else falls into place.

I don’t have to worry about what the future holds, or who is going to be involved in it. God works out those things on my behalf as I seek him first and foremost. He doesn’t need my help, He can do a better job of my life when I get out of the way and let him do what he does best! God is moving and I chose to move with him. Theres no time to waste in my old cycles of life.

Here’s the thing Satan, you lied to me, and I believed it. But Jesus has exposed it and therefore it no longer has a hold on my life. The cycle is broken in Jesus name and there’s nothing you can do about it. SUCKA!

I am changed because of Your love for me.

Beautiful exchange.

Here are my passions.

Here are my desires.

Here are my dreams.

Here are my goals.

Lord here is my heart.

I lay them all down before You and ask that as I walk out the life you have called me to,  that you would form them until they are completely aligned with YOUR heart. amen.

Rock what you got.

I have never been one who cares to keep up with the latest trends. In fact I usually wait till they are out of season to purchase them because they are far cheaper. I care about how I look and dress but not to the point of making society or anyone else happy. When I was in grade 7-9 I went through an anti-comformity stage. I wore skirts over jeans, pants with “apple” patches (which I absolutely loved at the time) and I didn’t care much about make up. In my younger years I was definitely a tom boy. I didn’t start wearing dresses till grad and I definitely didn’t start wearing heels regularly till my first year in college. I’m the kind of girl that wears summery flower dresses in fall, in which apparently your supposed to wear scarves, sweaters and boots. I’m the kind of girl that gets the freebie phones that are so technologically behind that it can’t even update my Facebook status. I have an IPod that isn’t a touch and it no longer exists in stores.

Every time I go shopping I feel the pressure to buy certain articles of clothing in order to fit in with everyone else around me. There is nothing wrong with how the people around me dress, in fact I think they are all quite stylish. But there was one time this summer where I set out to buy a certain article of clothing but every time I tried it on, I felt a part of myself dying. I didn’t feel like me in them. I knew that the only reason I would be buying them was to make certain people notice and then perhaps they would like me more. But that’s not me.

I like sneakers more than flats. I like flared jeans more than skinny jeans. I like jackets  more than pea coats. I like sweaters more than cardigans.

There is nothing wrong with these things, in fact I just bought a pair of skinny jeans that I really like.  I’ll never be the “trendy girl”, at least not in the eyes of society, but I am really quite fine with that. I’d rather wear the clothes I like and be confident then always wear the latest fashions and my self esteem be a mess. 

Never dress  to impress, be confident in who you are and what you are comfortable wearing and if that’s the latest trends then rock them and if its not then rock that too.

Bottom line: Be yourself, whatever that looks like!

My God’s not dead, He’s surely alive!

Tonight I joined over 11,000 young people in praising God, all of us under one roof! It was absolutely phenomenal. Nothing moves me quite like the sight of over 22,000 arms in the air and everyone singing at the top of their lungs – all for one purpose, to bring Jesus Christ glory!

Tonight God spoke to me, and I want to write it down and allow it to be solidified in my heart. It will serve as a reminder in the hard times as to what God has spoken to me.

1. God is 100% for me, therefore nothing can stop or stand against me.

2. God’s plan for my life has to do with the passions that are burning inside of my heart. As I begin to walk out these passions in the way described in Col 3:17, God will continue to shape and mold them to line up directly with what He has planned.

3. I can pray and intercede and have total faith that God is both hearing and answering my prayers. I have no doubt that as David Crowder sang “How He Loves” and I interceded for those I love to experience the Love of God…that at that moment, no matter where they were they indeed felt Gods love.

4. Dreaming HUGE is exactly what God is asking me to do. There’s no doubt in my mind, and I no longer feel like an “out there” dreamer, but instead that my huge dreams are in hugely capable hands! Not only do I believe my huge dreams will come true, but I believe that they will be fulfilled in an ever huger way than I could have possibly imagined to dream for myself. My God isn’t small, nor are the plans and dreams He has for His Children.

5. I am exactly where I am supposed to be.

amen.

“I will not doubt in the dark what God has shown me in the light”

I’m off and running…

You're valuable, and you don’t even know it.

My heart aches so bad right now. Its so broken and hurting especially for those who I hold dear. I can’t look at certain peoples pictures because they bring me to tears. I know this girl, she’s so beautiful, talented and amazing but she has no clue of her worth. She doesn’t know how incredibly loved she is, and that that love has nothing to do with sex. She doesn’t know how valuable she is and that God sees her as worth dying for. There are a lot of people in my life that have such great potential but they are settling for lives that are way less that God has for them. It’s sad. The hard thing for me is that the only thing I can do other than make the most of every conversation is to pray for them. This is a point of discouragement in my life. I don’t know how to pray for these people, I love them so incredibly much but words fail me. I think a lot of it stems from being far away from them and never seeing the situations get any better. I’ve lost motivation, which is downright terrible.

God renew my passion for my loved ones. Teach me how to intercede for them in a way that isn’t infiltrated with doubt. Cause my faith to arise, and my trust in Your promises to be unrelenting. Let Your all consuming passion overtake me until I pray without ceasing and without thinking about it. Let it be an overflow of my heart.

I love you.