God doesn’t play tug-of-war.

God won’t rip your burdens out of your hands.

God won’t pry your struggles out of your clenched fingers

God won’t invite himself into your heart

God won’t force you to choose Him.

He’s a gentleman.

Sure He might bring circumstances across your path that force you to your knees or to a similar place where you can finally let go, but He won’t make you do anything. It’s your choice…are you going to be obedient?

In the past there have been certain situations or struggles in my own life that I have cried out to God to take from me, but at the same time I was holding onto them so tightly. Fear keeps our fists closed, but faith stands with open hands ready to surrender.

Let Go. Let Go. Let Go and let God take the hurt, pain, struggle, addiction and fear and replace it with love, wholeness, joy and faith.

What God gives in return for our “stuff”, far outweighs anything we view as valuable at our breaking point.

Let Go. trust. Let Go. trust. trust.

Lord, I give myself to thee.

I’ve come to the realization that even if I never get the opportunity to lead worship for 10,000 people, even if I never marry, even if I never record an album, even if I never hold an orphan child, even if I never get to travel to another country, even if my life doesn’t play out the way I desire……I will rest content and continue to declare that God is good, faithful and just. 'Cause this life isn't about me, and what I want to accomplish. It's about living in total abandonment to the one who put me on this earth, whatever that looks like.

Today I laid down my dreams, and in the process was taught how to dream bigger.

I'm excited for what the future holds.

God is good. God is faithful. God is just.

The more I seek you, the more I find You. The more I find You, the more I love You.

I find myself longing for more of God, to be more intimate with Him, and to know Him better and more deeply. As I was praying these things during worship this past week, God began to speak to me. He said “I don’t want your lip service. If you want me, show me” ouch

I quickly realized that words are meaningless unless they are backed up with actions. 

God loves to hear us pray, He delights in our desires,  and He smiles when he sees our hearts long for him. But if all we are doing is talking about it, our words are just noise.  It’s like if your boyfriend or girlfriend told you they loved you, yet they never spent time with you, didn’t care to know how you were doing  and never showed interest in your passions and desires. Now, when they said “I love You” would you actually believe them? I sure wouldn’t.

It’s easy to say you want more of God. It’s easy to say He’s your everything. It’s easy to say you want to serve Him. It’s easy to say you want to be intimate with Him. etc.

But what are your actions saying?

Let God search your heart & life. Be honest with yourself on how much time your spending on meaningless things and how much your spending on Him.  Make the necessary sacrifices and changes needed in order to make your actions  speak louder than your words.

You won’t regret it.

You may fall, but I swear that I’ll help you believe.

Something that I often struggle with is the disconnect between my dreams and where God currently has me. In the midst of it, its hard to see how they are supposed to connect and be fulfilled.

This morning I began to read the account of Joseph’s life. Like me, he was a dreamer. He had crazy dreams. He dreamt of ruling over his brothers and them bowing down to him. He boldly told his brothers exactly what he dreamt because he knew it was going to happen. There was no doubt in his mind that these dreams were straight from heaven and that in the perfect timing they would be fulfilled.

When God casts vision over our lives and gives us dreams that are beyond ourselves, we are always put to the test. It was the same in Joseph’s day. He didn’t get these dreams and see them fulfilled without first going through trials, pain and prison.

His brothers sold him to the Ishmaelites who then sold him to Potiphar in Egypt. Do you think that Joseph was excited about this? Do you think he was rejoicing saying: "Yes my dreams are being fulfilled!”? I doubt it. His brothers had just betrayed him and now he was in a foreign land with foreign people and the problems didn’t stop there. Joseph was then falsely accused of trying to sleep with Potiphar’s wife and was thrown in prison. I’m sure questions arose “why would my brothers bow to me in here? How will I ever rule?”

In the midst of the trials it’s hard to see the end result, actually its nearly impossible!.

But if we look fully at Joseph's story we see that God used each trial that he went through to prepare him for his destiny. Even in prison God granted him favour and the prison warden put Him in charge of the prisoners.  He later goes on to become the governor of the land and his dreams are fulfilled exactly how God told him they would be.
Joseph never gave up on his dreams, He never let discouragement and doubt creep in and take him off course. He just lived his life, and allowed God to work through him in every situation and state he found himself in. 

Lesson: Never doubt in the dark what God revealed to you in the light. No matter how distant or impossible the dreams that God has given you seem, continue to be diligent where He has placed you and one day you’ll be able to look back and see how each step and each opportunity has prepared you for your destiny.

Never stop dreaming. Never stop believing. Never lose hope.

“You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives” –Genesis 50:20

What made you hesitate to tell me with words?

 

How is it that the words that are left unsaid are often the ones that hurt or affect us the most? 

People everywhere are hurting from never hearing “I love you” 3 simple but powerful and life changing words. People live in regret because they never told someone how they felt about them, and years later they are still wishing they had. We take for granted the people around us, never telling them enough how much we appreciate, care, support and love them.

Sure there are things that should obviously be left unsaid but sometimes I think we live too safe, we don’t take enough risks, we keep what needs to be said the most -unsaid.

Don’t leave important words unspoken.

Don’t leave healing words unspoken.

Don’t leave encouraging words unspoken.

Don’t leave apologies unspoken.

Don’t leave honest words unspoken.

Never leave “I love you” unspoken.

Garbage in, Garbage out.

Above all else guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life. Put away perversity from your mouth; keep corrupt talk far from your lips. Let your eyes look straight ahead, fix your gaze directly before you.”  -Prov 4:23-25

This verse has hit me really hard recently. There are a few reality shows on TV that I love to watch. I find it interesting to see how others live their lives, especially those who are rich and famous. One the plane ride home I had watched a show about the latest Hollywood news and after I felt so disgusting. The next day I watched a few episodes of one of my fav reality shows, and felt even grosser after that. I was filling one of my friends in on an episode that I had recently watched and she said “I don’t know what disgusts me more, the fact that it was about that, or the fact that you were watching it”  ouch.

It wasn't just her words that hit me heard, but God had already been convicting me about the importance of filling my mind, heart and spirit with God glorifying things.  It’s easy to justify sin. It’s easy to say that because I’ve been a Christian my entire life I can watch whatever I want and it won’t affect me. WRONG. It doesn’t matter how seasoned a Christian you are, or how strong you think you are, The devil is looking to tear you apart and even the smallest door is enough for him to burst through.

We are to guard our hearts. This isn't just in the “relational way” We need to guard our hearts from perversity, filthy language, sexual influences, anything that doesn’t bring a smile to Gods face.  You can’t expect to watch trashy shows, listen to degrading music and be intimate with God. It doesn’t work that way.

You become what you behold.

I wish this was easy. I wish I could have my cake and eat it too. But its time we start counting the cost of purity, holiness and righteousness and take a stand to guard our hearts, minds, and spirits from the deceitfulness of the enemy.

No matter how big or small this seems to you, its worth taking the time to seek God about.

What is stopping you from walking in total purity and holiness? What is God asking you to cut out of your life? What is the root of the words you say or the thoughts you think? What are you beholding?

“For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks” – Matthew 12:34

 

Some things we don’t talk about, rather do without.

Today, for some reason, it dawned on me that life would be so much easier If I stopped worrying about stupid & meaningless things – and just let life happen.

Dear worry,

I am letting you go, you have consumed enough of my thoughts to last a lifetime and it stops here. Don’t bother coming back, ‘cause I won’t answer the door.

                                sincerely, Jess.

Sometimes the hardest thing and the right thing are the same.

Today is my last day at home. It has been 2.5 weeks full of relaxation, excitement and renewal. Every time I come home I realize how much I’ve grown up, and how much I still have to go! Leaving here is like leaving my safe house. As I leave I am faced with many of life’s big questions and decisions. I really should be used to this, but trusting can be hard no matter where you are at in your relationship with God.

Tomorrow I step out of the boat and begin to walk on water. If I doubt and worry I’ll sink for sure. But if i keep my eyes fixed on the eyes of my creator, the only one who holds my security in His hands, I won’t even notice the waves crashing around me.

I’m ready to get my feet wet.

In time we’ll find this was no surprise.

2011 is the year I follow my dreams

2011 is the year I stop waiting and start living

2011 is the year I stop living my life for other people

2011 is the year I stand my ground; no longer apologizing for what I firmly believe and am convicted of.

2011 is the year I take risks and leave no chance untaken.

2011 is the year I’m focused

2011 is the year I walk fearlessly

2011 is the year my heart trusts.

2011 is the year I raise my voice

2011 is the year I am more spontaneous

2011 is the year I laugh more than I cry

2011 is the year I have nothing to lose and everything to gain

2011 is the year I am ME